The other day, I was out waiting on my BFF AGAIN!!! (always late!). I has having a cocktail, when my ears tuned into a conversation between two women next to me.
It seemed the one chick – let’s call her Debbie (all names have been changed). Though I don’t really know her but I thought it was cool to say that. Anyway seemed Debbie was about to embark on an affair. Or perhaps was already cheating.
The lover had invited Debbie on an outing. The conversation went something like this:
Debbie: Omg yes, so he’s invited me on an outing on his yacht (it was just a boat, but yacht sounds better).
Friend: Omg that’s exciting! What are you going to do?
Debbie: Well, he wants me to drive an hour to meet him. He’s going to pick me up from there and drive another hour to spend the day on his boat. He’s flying on (owns a private jet).
Friend: Wow! That’s crazy. But I’m so jealous.
Debbie: Well, yes. I am going to leave home like I am going to work, but going to stop at a friends house to get dressed. I also need a wax and my hair done. Oh! I should probably get a mani and pedi too!
Debbie: I went shopping today for an outfit. I hope he doesn’t think I am going to have sex. Like I am just flirting. What are you doing? Want to come?
Friend: Dayum! I can’t I work. I would have totally gone.
Debbie: Well, I am thinking I’ll drive to train station and take train. Oh wait, better if I have my car so I can leave when I want to.
Friend: True, very true. You don’t want to be stuck there.
Debbie: Right. I’ll take my car. That way when it’s time to go it’s time to go. On way back I”ll meet friends out for drink so I have an alibi.
Friend: Good thinking.
Debbie: (Checks phone) Oh he just cancelled.
Debbie: Thank god. I wasn’t going nowhere, but it was fun while I thought I was.
Me: Insert thinking and LMFAO emoji here.
Phfew! I was exhausted by the end of that convo. Like this is too much work for a possible piece of ass.
So my question is: Is the sneaking around, planning, and lying even worth it. Like shit I am beat thinking about it?
I am just too old for this. It is too much work. How do you keep the lies in order? And at my age, like really, if I am going to cheat he better be paying a huge bill or buying me gifts or something or other.
Like I get it folks! Sometimes the excitement of something new is so overwhelming. And though we are the most intelligent (supposedly) species we are also just animals when it comes to sex. Actually, worst. Some animals stick to their sexual partner for life!
I guess when you’re younger its easier. When we are younger we can be very self centered, not thinking of anyone else about ourselves and feeling entitled to what we want. But as I’ve gotten older I have learned several things:
- Karma is a fucking bitch.
- Treat everyone with kindness.
- Your conscience will not let you sleep at night.
But again no judgement here, because at the end of the day anyone can fall into the trap. And quite frankly it is exciting!! And sometimes at the end of the day, it could be worth it. They say the grass is not necessarily greener on the other side, but what happens when your partner is not watering your grass? I would have taken the yacht to find greener grass!
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