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Because you are worthy and deserving..

Hey! Guys and Gals!  Happy Friday! Happy Memorial Day Weekend!  Happy long weekend! Happy almost end of the school year to my fellow teachers everywhere! There is light at the end of the tunnel.

However, that light for many teachers is a dim and “POOR” light.  Summer is a struggle for lots of teachers.  Even teachers who set up summer bank accounts somehow manage to run out of funds two weeks before September.

Recently, I was thinking of my impending summer break and my bank account.  And you now how that is: One thought led to another.  I thought of how much money I needed for summer bills, then to having to dip into the little savings I have, to finally thoughts of the realization how “poor” I really will be and should stick to peanut butter and jelly.

And like all crazy folks I started thinking about why I didn’t have more. Why can’t I be rich? How does so and so have so much making less?  Right? We all do it.  Am I not good enough, smart enough, savvy enough to have more?  We start thinking there is something wrong or some reason why we are unworthy and undeserving of having more.  Perhaps we are repaying a karma. Who knows?

But, why do we believe ourselves unworthy and undeserving off all the wonderful things we want?

Why do we believe we don’t deserve that awesome house? or job? or car?

Why do we believe we don’t deserve to travel to our hearts content? Or get paid what we believe we’re really worth at work?

Why do we believe that we don’t deserve a fantastic relationship with a wonderful loving partner who takes care of us mentally, physically and spiritually?

I’ll tell you why – because we live in a society with a scarcity mindset or a scarcity mentality.

Many people have what’s known as a scarcity mindset or scarcity mentality. In the simplest terms, the scarcity mindset is the belief that there will never be enough — whether it’s money, food, emotions or something else entirely — and as a result, your actions and thought stem from a place of lack. 

https://www.debtroundup.com/scarcity-mindset-keeping-you-poor/ Jul 16, 2014

Currently, only 3.5 million (or 3.5%) of the 100 million households in America are considered wealthy.  As of 2016, there were 43.1 million people living in poverty in the U.S.  That leaves approximately 53 million Americans that are supposedly “ok” financially.

Of course, this is based on a poverty line of $25K for a family of 4.  I mean can even one person live on $25K a year? Probably not, making that 53 million totally skewed.

Anyway, back to this scarcity mentality.  With all this said, yes we live in a society where we hoard whatever we have or come into because we are afraid there isn’t enough to go stephen-covey-570749around. We don’t care if in that hoarding we are taking away from someone else because it is every man for himself in this country.

 

What we don’t realize is that our thoughts create our reality.  If we believe we don’t have enough we will attract not having enough.   Our universe and everything around us is energy.  Our thoughts are energy.  Our words are energy.  Emotions are energy.  From science class we know energy  makes things happen.

Energy lights up a bulb.  Energy makes a car move.  Energy makes our pulse quicken and our heart pump faster.  Energy makes our thoughts turn into reality because what we focus on is what we manifest.

When we think we don’t have enough, we begin to behave as if we don’t have enough.

Folks!  Listen up: There is more than enough food, money, and love to go around!!!!!  It’s a matter of thinking it into existence!!!

Think about this scenario: Have you ever been up at night stressing over your bills and bank account?  Maybe you stay up all night thinking about it.  Tossing and turning. You lose sleep.

You are so exhausted in the morning you might oversleep and get to work late – getting yourself in trouble with your boss.  Your tone for the day has unfortunately been set and you keep falling deeper and deeper.

You’re so cranky you snap at co-workers or clients (maybe killing a deal).  You are so exhausted you can’t focus or complete a project – getting yourself in further trouble with your boss. 

All this negative energy continues impacting your performance (over time) and before you know it, you’re let go and NOW you really are in lack because you’re not getting a paycheck.

Listen, this is an extreme, but not far-fetched.  This is how our thoughts create our reality.  You think so much about scarcity and lack eventually you really end up lacking. However, this whole scenario could have and would have played out differently if our thoughts about it and reaction were positive.

But wait, know that these thoughts and feelings are not rooted in money itself.  They are rooted in feelings of unworthiness.  Feeling that we don’t deserve EVERYTHING we desire because of a bunch of baggage we have been carrying around for years.

If you want to get all the things you desire, first and foremost, be grateful for everything you have because at the end of the day someone has less – way less!

Believe that you already have whatever it is you are wanting. Act as if you already have it by giving thanks for it.  Visualize having it, feel the feelings of joy of owning it.

This is not only for material things. This works for that relationship you want.  It works for emotional and mental health.  Speak it into existence.  Don’t worry about how or when its coming just be thankful that it’s already here.

This sounds like mumbo-jumbo but the energy and thoughts you create when you are feeling happy and abundant attract more things that will bring you those feelings.

There is enough to go around and the moment you think it, see it, speak it, it is yours.

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♥LolaUncorked

 

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Half centuries’ worth of lessons….

I remember as a kid thinking that I would never make it to 40.  To me 40 was so old.  I always said I don’t want to live past 60.  No lie! With each passing decade, I would push it back.  Ok, 70 doesn’t look too bad and now as I am embarking on my last year in my 40s, I am thinking that hey, 80 is looking pretty good. LOL!

As I approach 50, I’ve been thinking a lot about my life up until now, lessons learned, and things I still want to do!

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This is what 49 looks like!PC| Joanna Martinez

This blog is about the important lessons that though I wish I had known then what I know now, I understand that these lesson came at the time I was ready to receive them.  I am not going to share 50 lessons, but I will share a few important lessons from my 20’s, 30s and 40s.

In my 20s, I was already married.  I got married, had my first by 23, bought a house, two new cars, worked.  I had lots of friends and my family.  By 25, I was separated.  All of the wives from our circle dropped me, except for two.  I guess I was contagious.  I noticed that the wives who dropped me were the ones that would run their mouths at get togethers.  Talking about how horrible their husbands were, and how they checked their phones, and lied about going out.

In the beginning of my marriage, I was like hey! My husband is great and so is my marriage.  I couldn’t understand why they wouldn’t leave their marriage if they were so miserable.  I noticed that as time went, I started to pick up some of their bad habits.  Became negative.  Didn’t trust my husband.  Wanted to go out and party.

We started having lots of trust issues, which led to arguments and fights and eventually a separation.  These women were by no means the cause of our separation, but I can definitely say that the culture they created influenced me in some ways.

It’s like that saying in spanish “El que anda con perros aprende a ladrar.” He who runs with dogs learns how to bark. Well, I was surrounded by so much negativity, I became unhappy.  I started to become like them, miserable, distrustful, at times, many times dishonest.

Instead of trying to make it work, I ran.  I wanted out.  Marriage was too hard.  And all those wives made it seem like it would only get worst.  So I left and guess what, many of those women are still with their husbands.  Some of them even hit on my ex husband while we were separated and even once we were trying to make things work.

The lessons that I learned is that couples need to KEEP YOUR ISSUES PRIVATE! Nobody needs to know about the argument you had, or that he or she cheated, or didn’t come home.  Misery loves company!  Men and women alike can be vultures circling, waiting on prey, literally.  The minute there is dissent between a couple, especially, if you guys seem to have it all, there is someone waiting to step in and snatch it up.  Keep your business to yourself and if you go out after a fight, put on a HAPPY FACE or stay home.

DO NOT CREATE A CULTURE OF MISTRUST by going through pockets, emails and telephones and whatever else these days.  Most times when you go looking for something you will find something and unless you are ready to address it, leave it alone.

COMMUNICATION is key!  I was a horrible communicator.  Didn’t want to talk about the issues, clammed up, shut down.  This is the worst thing EVER!  Talk, talk, talk, address the issues as quickly as they come.  Have weekly or bi weekly check ins just to gauge the relationships’ health status.

REMEMBER YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS SACRED! TREAT IT AS SUCH!

Moving along to my 30s!  Well 30s was fun!  I had my second daughter at 30 and officially got divorced.  But my 30s wasn’t about any relationship lessons, though I learned some more.  My 30s was really about my kids and raising them.  I learned how observant children are.  With today’s technology, we see kids walking around with cell phones and Ipads.  We encourage it because half the time we are so busy and exhausted, we welcome the downtime we get when the kids are busy engaged in social media.

We believe they are not paying attention! Well, trust me they are. Kids are really SPONGES!  They may be engrossed in their technology and social media, but they are absorbing their environment through their pores- words being spoken, arguments being had, actions of adults, music, people coming and going! They listen as we curse out the jerk who cut us off.  Their ears perk as we sit with friends judging or making fun of someone.  They feel when we are being not so kind and also when we do something good!  Be careful of the things you say or do or who bring around because kids are learning lessons from the people around them and their actions.

And finally to my 40s! Wow this was the age I thought I’d never get to and here I am wrapping this decade up within the next 365 days a year.  One lesson is how fast time flies as you get older.  The years just start to blend and it really blows my mind.  It is also a reminder that there is still a list of things I want to do, places I want to visit, experiences I want to have.

I did a lot of work in my 40s, personally and spiritually!  I’ve come to live by two mantras, one a good friend of mine said one day and has stuck with me – “I want to have experiences, not things!- (tweetable!) and the second one is – “Do all things with love.” (bible quote 1 Corinthians 16:14).

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These both carry me through out my days.  They are part of my gratitude journal writing.  I repeat them several times a day especially when I am teaching to remind myself that every person I encounter, student, staff, parent or stranger on the street needs to be dealt with love.  This past year, I have really, really worked to embrace the now. To not let stress get to me.  To leave work at work.  To stay in the present in all activities and interactions.

And I have to say that my days are easier and more fulfilling.  I focus more on the type of person I want to be rather than being so hard on myself for mistakes made.  I forgive myself quicker.  I reflect a lot.  Even though I’ve been on this spiritual journey for at least 20 years, I can say the most growth has occurred in the last couple of years.  I am so excited to continue the work in my 50s!  To keep learning and growing and living my best life!  I am ready to have more experiences, more travel, more learning, more loving and sharing!!!

I went to a birthday party not too long ago, a 50th, and the birthday person, was basically like “ugh” about turning 50.  They couldn’t figure out why I was so excited and looking forward to it!  I guess to me it’s just another year to do more, be more, be better, kinder, to grow!  And hell, everyone knows I love a good party, so 50 is going to be huge!

♥lolauncorked

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Un”Belize”able!!!

 

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I can’t believe I made it to Belize.  There’s nothing better than vocalizing and visualizing and it coming true.  Belize has definitely been in my bucket list – not for long! But that’s the point. Make a list, do it and check it off!  That’s what I did.

This trip was A M A Z I N G!!!!

I purchased a Groupon for my trip to Belize with separate airfare.  And let me give you a little heads up about trips on Groupon (in case you don’t already know).  I love Groupon, HOWEVER, read the fine print or call the destination before purchasing.  I DID NOT! and so even though the Groupon was a great deal, there were a few hidden fees and additional costs that we did not find out about until we were locked into the Groupon.

The package included accommodations for two nights and ziplining (and equipment)  at the Bocawina Rainforest Resort and two nights at Tobacco Caye (pronounced key).  Tobacco Caye is home to the second largest barrier reef- second to of course Australia so we also had access to snorkeling equipment as well as paddle boarding (bucket list item √)!!!  Transportation from Dandriga to Bocawina and back to Dandriga for our ride to Tobacco Caye was also included.  That’s it!  Everything else was out of pocket!

Let me tell you what those costs were. We had to pay for transportation from airport to the town of Dandriga (which FYI was about a three hour ride in some serious August heat in a what resembled a beat-up school bus… no lie! lol).  This ride was $20 (all these fees are in US dollars and per person).  Belize has the Belizean dollar which is basically US money, but you get 2 for 1 which is nice).  You  could also fly in a prop airplane for about $90.  No thanks!  We chose the bus.  There is a 20 minute boat ride from Dandriga to Tobacco Caye.  FYI, this is a dingy with a motor attached, expect nothing else.  Which consequently got stuck about 5 minutes out from the island and we had to wait to be towed in.  Only ME!  This ride cost $10-15.  Food was not included at either location.  Bocawina had a very nice restaurant and the cost of food is comparable to a nice restaurant here.

 

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I loved this sign in the restaurant.

 

At Tobacco Caye we were required to purchase a meal plan which included breakfast, lunch and dinner served in the dining hall of the main cabin.  This was at a cost of about $36 per day and is paid upon check in.  This was something I didn’t like as I don’t necessarily eat three meals a day on vacation, but whatever.  There was also a tourist fee paid upon entrance to both Bocawina and Tobacco Caye.  All in all we paid an additional $200 in extra costs not including our airfare which averaged about $440 roundtrip.  On the flip side, the cost of food in the local town of Dandriga was very inexpensive.  Their local beer Belikin was about $2, not bad as you stroll through the town in 90 degree weather.  We went in August, it was HOT, which I love, some of you may not and may want to research cooler time to visit.

Both Tobacco Caye and Bocawina are heaven on earth.  Considering we were in a dense rainforest and no air conditioning in our cabin (just ceiling fans) surprisingly we didn’t encounter too many bug bites.

Anyway, I got a chance to zipline in Bocawina . OMG I thought I was going to die!!!!  I still can’t believe I did it, and I would be scared to do it again, but wouldn’t hesitate!  What a thrill zipping through those tree tops.  Bocawina has the longest zipline in Belize! It’s also home to like 200 different species of birds.  The only thing I would have liked was a pool or hot tub on site, but our cabana was perfect.  High ceilings, ceiling fan and a beautiful veranda with a hammock.  We took a hookah (of course), liquor, playing cards, snacks, so our two nights there were perfect!

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The entryway to our accommodations at Bocawina…

Our second night we hung out at the restaurant bar and our bartender let us sample different proofs of their Old Master Rum, let’s just say I remember very little of that night.  I did pick up some bottles of Belize Rum to bring home, that was more to my liking.  Didn’t burn a whole in my esophagus!  Leaving was bittersweet.  The staff at the resort were amazing including, Wilson, our driver/ziplining guide/drinking partner/ everything else he did there.  Wilson spoke 7 languages!!!! sorry the teacher in me loves that!

Off we were to our island paradise!  We had to take a bus to the dock for our trip to Tobacco Caye.  After getting stuck in the ocean and me having visions of sharks circling us, we were rescued and tugged in to the island.  Belize was hit by Hurricane Irma back in 2017. Irma wreaked havoc on this little island, so it leaves a lot to be desired as you pull up.  Our accommodations were at the Tobacco Caye (clearly) Lodge).  This island is a mix of tourists (us), the staff who run the facilities, and some locals that live there.  We were placed in a one room hut facing the ocean with a door in back which led to a cute little porch.  The running water in the hut is provided from a tank that collects rain water.  There is a fan in the room.  Again no air conditioner, but honestly being so close to the ocean, the breeze that flowed was more than enough for me. I know it sounds bareboned and if you’re used to luxurious accomodations, then this is not the place to stay at.  If you’re looking for an organic experience connecting with your surroundings – then this is it!!! Go for it! I can be a little bougee on vacation, but I really loved this place.

The island is so small you can literally walk from end to end in less than 10 minutes.  The water is so clear and in some parts so shallow you can walk out 50 feet and water is still knee level.  Of course that’s only if you don’t mind dodging the stingrays (that I thought were manatees) that swim back and forth, back and forth all day.  Literally!  I have a whole new respect for the ocean and its inhabitants.  At the Caye you can pay the locals to go and dive for fresh lobster for about $20US which is then cooked for you in the dining hall.

Overall, two thumbs up for my trip to Belize.  Definitely would like to go back and visit the city and do some nightlife.  This vacation was chill.  Loved every second of it and would go back in heartbeat.

♥LolaUncorked

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2018: The Start of New Beginnings

2018: The Start of New Beginnings

I am not quite sure why I wanted to start this blog…except for three things….

  1. I’ve always wanted to be a writer and though I’ve had little to no formal training, I’ve written a lot of stuff…now it’s time to put it out there…
  2. As I inch excitedly towards 50, I’ve reached a point in my life where it is IMPERATIVE that I find my truth…I need to find my space in this world and I need to find my purpose…it is a matter of life and death….dramatic, but no seriously. Something has been pulling at me for quite some time and it is time to answer that call.
  3. And lastly, #3 I’ve been on a spiritual journey for the last 20 something years…and I don’t feel I am any closer today than I was then…but that’s me being hard on myself because we are our worst critics.   And though I don’t knock the journey… I started to think that if I started to blog it …I WOULD SOMEHOW BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR IT… by all of you… and so here goes…

          Can I just say this blogging business is not easy!!! I started back in October and am still trying to figure it out.  Purchased books, researched blogs, read a lot of them, hired someone to help me with the layout and all.  What I’ve learned is you need to be consistent with it.  If I stayed away from it for more than a couple of days, when I revisited, it felt like the first time.  

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This me attempting to have my photos taken for this blog….AWKWARD… PC|Geralogy.com

        I googled the top bloggers of 2017 and one of the lists I found gave me the following information: Out of the top bloggers considered by that site – 59 were women, 6 were men, 57 were Caucasian and 2 of color.  Insert eyebrow raised here.  Where are all the Latino bloggers?  Where are all the Latino lifestyle bloggers?  Where are all the Latino lifestyle bloggers for women over 40 (nearing 50)?  Don’t get me wrong.  I follow a few fashion bloggers and I absolutely adore them, but at my age, fashion is not a top priority.  I am more interested in personal growth, health, travel, and being inspired.

     So I guess this is where I come in – because that is what I will be writing about.  I’ll share some of my favorite personal growth authors, articles, musings; even some of the stuff I’ve written. I want to share with you places I have visited and places in my bucket list.  You’ll see lots of pictures and funny stories about my adventures with Max.  You’ll even read some endless streams of consciousness about a little of bit of everything because goodness knows I have a lot of thoughts about a lot of things.  

     My hope is that I can inspire some of you to start on your own blogging journey and be inspired by all of you to keep on keeping on!

      Let the journey begin!

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♥LolaUncorked